By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=John_R._Morella,_Ph.D.]John R. Morella, Ph.D.
One of the tasks of adolescence is formation of a personal identification and a major part of this is sexual identity. Children easily label themselves as male or female, but sexual orientation does not come totally established until late adolescence. In my clinical practice, I counseled many youngsters for sexual identity confusion, as well as those openly homosexual. They struggled in their "adjustments" to a society that provided acceptance sparingly. I saw the anguish of the child and the teen as they attempted to cope with being and feeling different from their peers. Instead of living their childhood and teens years with expectations of the "normal" trials of their youth, they had to cope with:
Feeling crippling guilt about their sexual orientation.
Worry and fear about parental and peer response.
Being teased and ridiculed by their peers, and shunned by most people including love ones.
Worried about sexually transmitted diseases.
Discrimination in areas of group membership,in sports, employment, and social clubs.
Suicidal thoughts.
Inability to concentrate and focus on school.
Are my thoughts, feelings, and behaviors immoral, and will I go to hell?
They know that society will condemn them and their spirit of childhood will suffer.
Someday, maybe, there will exist a well-informed, well-considered, and yet fervent public conviction that the most deadly of all possible sins is the mutilation of a child's spirit. Erik Erikson
Homosexuality is not a classifiable psychological or mental disorder. In 1973, the American Psychiatric Association, in its revision of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manuel of Mental Disorders, removed homosexuality as a diagnosis. Gender Identity Disorder for Childhood and Adolescents are listed as dysfunctions. How prevalent are childhood and adolescent gender sexual identity disorders? A well done professional survey study was done in 1992, (Remafedi, G., et al) that included 34,706 students (grades seven through twelve) from diverse ethic, geographical, and socioeconomic strata. Overall, 10.7% were "unsure and confused" about their sexual orientation, 88.2% described themselves as heterosexual, and 1.1% as bisexual or predominantly homosexual. (Remafedi, G., et al)
In 2006, I conducted a survey of 186 high school school students (mostly middle-to-upper-middle socioeconomic and mostly Caucasians, freshmen through seniors) in my home state of Louisiana. Results indicated a 12% rate of confusion in sexual identity, the exact same rate for males and females.
A word or two of caution in interpreting the above data. Adolescence is a time to experiment, and certainly sexual activity is explored. Whatever the sexual activity, it does not indicate either a present or future sexual orientation. Misinterpreting the significance of teen sexual behavior in relation to sexual identity should be avoided. For example:
Many lesbian/gay teens are not sexually experienced.
Many lesbian/gay adolescents may have heterosexual experiences.
Heterosexual teens may have heterosexual experiences.
Some adolescents may self-identify as lesbian or gay without having homosexual or heterosexual experiences.
Some final words on child and teen sexual identity confusion:
�
Don't judge them. Have compassion, not pity or anger toward them. Accept them as a member of our humanity. If you are a parent of a gay teen, support them; if you are a teacher, protect them from peer abuse; if you are a neighbor, understand them; if you are a peer, include them.
Retired psychologist and academician with thirty-five years of experience working with children, teens, and their families. Currently, author of two nonfiction books written for the layperson; A Guide for Effective Psychotherapy (a consumer's guide for understanding mental health services) and Give Teens a Break! (a positive look at teens). My passion remains the same, the growth and mental welfare of our children. Please visit my website: http://www.johnmorella.com
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Sexual-Identity-Confusion-in-Teens&id=6473735] Sexual Identity Confusion in Teens
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Help Your Children in Great Ways
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Jesse_Wade]Jesse Wade
Being a 69 Year young "bag of mostly water" (human), and with quite a few 12 month periods of helping others (mostly teenagers) with all sorts of challenges and other assorted problems. And personally, I am totally 100% convinced that they are good folks, and have the potential to become great citizens through education and good guidance.
What really frustrates me, and others, is that because a few have disrupted some classes, and because some weird idiot/s are afraid to face the real problems, someone has said that we are not allowed to punish our children.
I was brought up the old fashion method, and I am still here today... actually, I am extremely elated over the fact that my parents cared enough!
Another item that seriously polarizes my happy self are those stupid fanatics that put their children out on the streets with no where to go, and nothing to do, but live there - attempting to find food out of dumpsters. And I have had two young folks relate that they were thrown out because they did not follow the bible... now how low-life can a person get? They pitch their children out in the name of god! All I can state here is that I truly hope there is a special place in the lower depths of ______ (you fill in the blank space) for them.
When I lived in Florida, and asked others about their children, I couldn't believe how many folks told me in different words, that their children" never call, write, or visit - the (off color names)." Well, I think I know why!
However; now that the above is out of my system, there are a myriad of ways to help your children... good education at school, the local library, making sure they get involved with one or more types of sports, Tai Chi, and many others methods of learning.
From the minute they are born, read to them as much as possible... even if they are crawling around on the floor, or playing with some toy --- they ARE listening... their brains are soaking up everything around them. Read to them every chance you get, and encourage them constantly to read.
But there is another device that should be adhered to on a regular basis is when they are out with friends, and you get a sudden gut instinct, intuition, or whatever you wish to name it, that something might not be right --- check! It doesn't matter how often, but check!
Yes, they are going to say that you don't trust them, you are embarrassing them, and maybe get loud... but it doesn't matter. Just calmly tell them that you did it to be sure they are safe, and because you love them!
I cannot begin to count the number of times I have heard the following statement from teenagers: "My parents don't care, they never check on me!" Trust me folks, you either check on them, or some gang or drug dealer will pay a lot of attention to them. It pays to check, and it pays off in the long run!
When you tell them they cannot do something, be very sure that you explain, again calmly, why! You have to remember that they do not have the education you do, nor do they have the experience you have. And if you do not explain it to them, they may never know why, until it is too late.
Another item I relate to them is when they are approached by someone who wants them to do something they know they shouldn't do, is to put the blame on their parents. Let them blame you, the parent.
When they are still young (not yet teenagers), one of the absolute best things you can do for them is help them discover their talents and abilities, show them how they can earn a good living at them, and then help them lay out the steps to attain those goals.
By helping them with the above, you give them hope for a happy future, confidence that they can attain the goals, and you prove to them that you do love them --- plus, you have laid the foundation for times in your elderly ages when you will be alone, and your children will call, write, and visit you.
One other important, fantastic, fabulous, and worthy benefit for you as the parent, is that you fulfilled one of your greatest responsibilities --- helping your children! Now just imagine what you can do next!
Discover Motivation, Remedies, Ways, Ideas, Tickles, Purples, Tips, and much more http://howtofacelife.com/
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Help-Your-Children-in-Great-Ways&id=6517091] Help Your Children in Great Ways
Being a 69 Year young "bag of mostly water" (human), and with quite a few 12 month periods of helping others (mostly teenagers) with all sorts of challenges and other assorted problems. And personally, I am totally 100% convinced that they are good folks, and have the potential to become great citizens through education and good guidance.
What really frustrates me, and others, is that because a few have disrupted some classes, and because some weird idiot/s are afraid to face the real problems, someone has said that we are not allowed to punish our children.
I was brought up the old fashion method, and I am still here today... actually, I am extremely elated over the fact that my parents cared enough!
Another item that seriously polarizes my happy self are those stupid fanatics that put their children out on the streets with no where to go, and nothing to do, but live there - attempting to find food out of dumpsters. And I have had two young folks relate that they were thrown out because they did not follow the bible... now how low-life can a person get? They pitch their children out in the name of god! All I can state here is that I truly hope there is a special place in the lower depths of ______ (you fill in the blank space) for them.
When I lived in Florida, and asked others about their children, I couldn't believe how many folks told me in different words, that their children" never call, write, or visit - the (off color names)." Well, I think I know why!
However; now that the above is out of my system, there are a myriad of ways to help your children... good education at school, the local library, making sure they get involved with one or more types of sports, Tai Chi, and many others methods of learning.
From the minute they are born, read to them as much as possible... even if they are crawling around on the floor, or playing with some toy --- they ARE listening... their brains are soaking up everything around them. Read to them every chance you get, and encourage them constantly to read.
But there is another device that should be adhered to on a regular basis is when they are out with friends, and you get a sudden gut instinct, intuition, or whatever you wish to name it, that something might not be right --- check! It doesn't matter how often, but check!
Yes, they are going to say that you don't trust them, you are embarrassing them, and maybe get loud... but it doesn't matter. Just calmly tell them that you did it to be sure they are safe, and because you love them!
I cannot begin to count the number of times I have heard the following statement from teenagers: "My parents don't care, they never check on me!" Trust me folks, you either check on them, or some gang or drug dealer will pay a lot of attention to them. It pays to check, and it pays off in the long run!
When you tell them they cannot do something, be very sure that you explain, again calmly, why! You have to remember that they do not have the education you do, nor do they have the experience you have. And if you do not explain it to them, they may never know why, until it is too late.
Another item I relate to them is when they are approached by someone who wants them to do something they know they shouldn't do, is to put the blame on their parents. Let them blame you, the parent.
When they are still young (not yet teenagers), one of the absolute best things you can do for them is help them discover their talents and abilities, show them how they can earn a good living at them, and then help them lay out the steps to attain those goals.
By helping them with the above, you give them hope for a happy future, confidence that they can attain the goals, and you prove to them that you do love them --- plus, you have laid the foundation for times in your elderly ages when you will be alone, and your children will call, write, and visit you.
One other important, fantastic, fabulous, and worthy benefit for you as the parent, is that you fulfilled one of your greatest responsibilities --- helping your children! Now just imagine what you can do next!
Discover Motivation, Remedies, Ways, Ideas, Tickles, Purples, Tips, and much more http://howtofacelife.com/
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Help-Your-Children-in-Great-Ways&id=6517091] Help Your Children in Great Ways
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
What You Can Do to Protect Your Children From Abuse
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Kerry_Graves]Kerry Graves
As parents, we do our best to keep our children healthy and safe. The truth is, we cannot always be there to protect them. However, there are some things that parents can do to reduce their children's exposure to high-risk individuals. A private investigator offers valuable services that help parents identify and avoid people who may want to harm their children.
Many children spend up to ten hours a day in the care of a babysitter, daycare worker, or teacher. We trust them with our most innocent loved ones, but how much do you really know about these people? Just because a childcare center or school claims that they run a background check on all of their employees, this may not be entirely true. A private investigator will complete a thorough background check on any caregiver using databases and information that the general public may not have access to. This allows parents to have a better idea of who the person looking after their child really is.
A background check will verify education as well as previous work experience. Gathering as much information as possible allows you to determine if the person is an appropriate caregiver for your child. Some parents may order a background check for other adults that routinely interact with their children. Neighbors, coaches, and youth leaders may have opportunities to be alone with your child. It is important that parents are aware of any adults that may have a history of harming children.
Once you hire a nanny or babysitter to work at your home, you may want to consider some type of surveillance to determine if they are acting appropriately around your children. "Nanny-cams" or hidden cameras in the home are a good way for parents to see what happens while their children are being supervised. A private investigator can set up a surveillance system throughout a home to allow parents full access to what goes on while they are away.
Some parents may enlist the assistance of a private investigator to provide surveillance on their child's caregiver while she is out in public with the child. He will document any incidences that may be detrimental to your child's wellbeing. This includes not using the proper restraints when driving, verbal abuse, or taking your child to places that are unauthorized by the parent. The investigator will also document any interaction the child may have with other adults that may be friends or acquaintances of the caregiver.
With a complete report from your investigator, you have a better idea of the type of people that spend time with your children. While there is nothing you can do to keep your children 100% safe all of the time, background checks and surveillance allows parents to monitor those adults who interact with their children daily. Unfortunately, there are adults out there who want to harm your children. Staying vigilant and proactive can help you avoid high-risk situations and hopefully, protect your children from possible abusers.
Mr. Kerry Graves, MSW, is a licensed and bonded [http://www.gravesinvestigations.com]private investigator and owner of Graves Investigations Inc., a private investigation and executive protection firm located in Greensboro, NC.
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?What-You-Can-Do-to-Protect-Your-Children-From-Abuse&id=6517773] What You Can Do to Protect Your Children From Abuse
As parents, we do our best to keep our children healthy and safe. The truth is, we cannot always be there to protect them. However, there are some things that parents can do to reduce their children's exposure to high-risk individuals. A private investigator offers valuable services that help parents identify and avoid people who may want to harm their children.
Many children spend up to ten hours a day in the care of a babysitter, daycare worker, or teacher. We trust them with our most innocent loved ones, but how much do you really know about these people? Just because a childcare center or school claims that they run a background check on all of their employees, this may not be entirely true. A private investigator will complete a thorough background check on any caregiver using databases and information that the general public may not have access to. This allows parents to have a better idea of who the person looking after their child really is.
A background check will verify education as well as previous work experience. Gathering as much information as possible allows you to determine if the person is an appropriate caregiver for your child. Some parents may order a background check for other adults that routinely interact with their children. Neighbors, coaches, and youth leaders may have opportunities to be alone with your child. It is important that parents are aware of any adults that may have a history of harming children.
Once you hire a nanny or babysitter to work at your home, you may want to consider some type of surveillance to determine if they are acting appropriately around your children. "Nanny-cams" or hidden cameras in the home are a good way for parents to see what happens while their children are being supervised. A private investigator can set up a surveillance system throughout a home to allow parents full access to what goes on while they are away.
Some parents may enlist the assistance of a private investigator to provide surveillance on their child's caregiver while she is out in public with the child. He will document any incidences that may be detrimental to your child's wellbeing. This includes not using the proper restraints when driving, verbal abuse, or taking your child to places that are unauthorized by the parent. The investigator will also document any interaction the child may have with other adults that may be friends or acquaintances of the caregiver.
With a complete report from your investigator, you have a better idea of the type of people that spend time with your children. While there is nothing you can do to keep your children 100% safe all of the time, background checks and surveillance allows parents to monitor those adults who interact with their children daily. Unfortunately, there are adults out there who want to harm your children. Staying vigilant and proactive can help you avoid high-risk situations and hopefully, protect your children from possible abusers.
Mr. Kerry Graves, MSW, is a licensed and bonded [http://www.gravesinvestigations.com]private investigator and owner of Graves Investigations Inc., a private investigation and executive protection firm located in Greensboro, NC.
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?What-You-Can-Do-to-Protect-Your-Children-From-Abuse&id=6517773] What You Can Do to Protect Your Children From Abuse
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Is the Internet Safe for Our Children?
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Lucy_Lewis]Lucy Lewis
It will come as no surprise that the younger generation of today know more about the internet world than some adults. I know that my 9 year old step daughter knows how to create and write her own blog, play games, write emails to her family, etc. When I was 9 years old I was interested in skating up and down the hill by my house, riding my bike around 'the block' walking my dog and rolling down the stairs in my duvet and going back up and do it all over again! The internet barely existed back then, but I know by the time I was 13 years old, the internet world took off and you could find a computer with internet access pretty much everywhere, in people's homes, schools, and the library. I remember fighting with my brother to get on it when it made the journey to our family home. We used to fight a lot about who would be going on it next and for how long and in the end we had to make a rota. I remember I used to go on to Google and find pictures of animals and things I liked and print them off (can you imagine my mum's face of me holding 50 pieces of paper in my hand all with pictures of animals on).
I also remember going on sites such as 'habbohotel' and 'yoville'. These sites were basically kid friendly chat rooms with little avatar people, creating your own houses and buying goods for it, harmless right? On the outside they look kid friendly and safe, but now that I am an adult and have step children of my own I know there are big flaws in those websites and that is, nothing that is said on these sites can be traced because it is on a separate server and I knew there were a lot of older men and women on there, some completely innocent, some who had a sinister side, but sites like this can be addictive to a young teenager to get thrown into the interactive world where you can be whoever you like with no consequences.
So how can we as parents make sure that our children are safe on the internet?
1. Make sure all the parental safety controls are on the computer, this is stop your child going onto sites that could potentially be dangerous such as an innocent looking chat room, giving you the chance to check out the site yourself before letting them go on it.
2. Make sure you have a copy of all conversations they have, even with friends, it may feel like spying, but it is for their safety. Just for your own reassurance if anything was to ever go wrong. You can do this by creating the accounts yourself so you know the username and passwords, or just asking them. The only instant messaging service I have found that doesn't save any conversations is ebuddy that is an online based messaging service. Worryingly ebuddy is on most internet phones these days. So beware of that.
3. Check the history every now and again to see the type of websites they are visiting.
4. It is also important for a parent before getting a computer to know how to use it themselves so they know how to check and prevent your child going on anything they shouldn't.
5. Talk to your child and make it clear that they must not give out personal information such as name, address etc.
These are just a few I could think of, but the ways you can protect your child on the internet is endless. Of course not all children will be in danger on the internet and may never visit sites they aren't supposed to, but with all the safety measures now available and trust between parent and child, the internet world is a safer place.
Does your website have a forum or chat room that is rarely monitored or you are worried about the safety of your website for children and young adults then please get in touch with http://www.liquidbubble.com who are web designers based in London that may be able to help you make it a safer place for children and young adults alike, or do you have a website that needs help boosting, increasing customers or profits then get in touch.
Lucy Lewis is new at writing articles, with her charming and inquisitive mind she wants to explore the literacy world in a whole different light. So watch out for further articles.
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Is-the-Internet-Safe-for-Our-Children?&id=6529319] Is the Internet Safe for Our Children?
It will come as no surprise that the younger generation of today know more about the internet world than some adults. I know that my 9 year old step daughter knows how to create and write her own blog, play games, write emails to her family, etc. When I was 9 years old I was interested in skating up and down the hill by my house, riding my bike around 'the block' walking my dog and rolling down the stairs in my duvet and going back up and do it all over again! The internet barely existed back then, but I know by the time I was 13 years old, the internet world took off and you could find a computer with internet access pretty much everywhere, in people's homes, schools, and the library. I remember fighting with my brother to get on it when it made the journey to our family home. We used to fight a lot about who would be going on it next and for how long and in the end we had to make a rota. I remember I used to go on to Google and find pictures of animals and things I liked and print them off (can you imagine my mum's face of me holding 50 pieces of paper in my hand all with pictures of animals on).
I also remember going on sites such as 'habbohotel' and 'yoville'. These sites were basically kid friendly chat rooms with little avatar people, creating your own houses and buying goods for it, harmless right? On the outside they look kid friendly and safe, but now that I am an adult and have step children of my own I know there are big flaws in those websites and that is, nothing that is said on these sites can be traced because it is on a separate server and I knew there were a lot of older men and women on there, some completely innocent, some who had a sinister side, but sites like this can be addictive to a young teenager to get thrown into the interactive world where you can be whoever you like with no consequences.
So how can we as parents make sure that our children are safe on the internet?
1. Make sure all the parental safety controls are on the computer, this is stop your child going onto sites that could potentially be dangerous such as an innocent looking chat room, giving you the chance to check out the site yourself before letting them go on it.
2. Make sure you have a copy of all conversations they have, even with friends, it may feel like spying, but it is for their safety. Just for your own reassurance if anything was to ever go wrong. You can do this by creating the accounts yourself so you know the username and passwords, or just asking them. The only instant messaging service I have found that doesn't save any conversations is ebuddy that is an online based messaging service. Worryingly ebuddy is on most internet phones these days. So beware of that.
3. Check the history every now and again to see the type of websites they are visiting.
4. It is also important for a parent before getting a computer to know how to use it themselves so they know how to check and prevent your child going on anything they shouldn't.
5. Talk to your child and make it clear that they must not give out personal information such as name, address etc.
These are just a few I could think of, but the ways you can protect your child on the internet is endless. Of course not all children will be in danger on the internet and may never visit sites they aren't supposed to, but with all the safety measures now available and trust between parent and child, the internet world is a safer place.
Does your website have a forum or chat room that is rarely monitored or you are worried about the safety of your website for children and young adults then please get in touch with http://www.liquidbubble.com who are web designers based in London that may be able to help you make it a safer place for children and young adults alike, or do you have a website that needs help boosting, increasing customers or profits then get in touch.
Lucy Lewis is new at writing articles, with her charming and inquisitive mind she wants to explore the literacy world in a whole different light. So watch out for further articles.
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Is-the-Internet-Safe-for-Our-Children?&id=6529319] Is the Internet Safe for Our Children?
Friday, December 23, 2011
Is the Internet Good for Our Children?
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Lucy_Lewis]Lucy Lewis
I believe without the internet for our children we would be taking away a valuable source of learning material. I know my 13 year old step daughter would think it was the end of the world without the internet. Her whole life is online as she would say, I will never be able to understand how she can spend all day with her friends and then come home from school and automatically go onto the computer and chat to the same friends she has been with all day long. She spends 60% of her time on social networking sites such as 'Facebook' but the rest of time she uses a variety of different website program called Picnik where she creates and edits pictures enabling her creative side, she goes onto YouTube to listen to songs, she even goes onto Google and finds quizzes and i.q tests she can do, and when she wasn't happy with the result she does them over and over to try to improve. I know if I put an i.q test in front of her that she has to write on she will say no in an instant. Kids think that the internet is one big game.
She also searches the internet for websites that will improve her equations for maths at school and goes on the GCSE Bitesize website and studies on her own accord with no word from us that in itself is a big feat for my step daughter. Websites such as the GCSE Bitesize website is a fantastic site for children of all ages and it also has learning games which both of my step daughters love to go on. She's always playing online games which test her spatial and learning skills as well as her overall general knowledge, and again just like her i.q tests she repeats them over and over again until she gets them all correct.
She also makes her own movies on windows movie maker, she makes music videos and then puts them on 'YouTube' I do not understand this program even after looking at it for several minutes, I would not have a clue what to do. She uses Google as a tool to learn and has even admitted that she will often turn to Google when she is too embarrassed or shy to ask anyone directly. This is an excellent learning tool for children who like my step daughter who has questions that want answering, but doesn't know who to ask. This is what the internet offers for children today.
Even though kids may spend the majority of time in front of the computer they are learning something new every day, whether that would be on an intellectual level or a creative level, either way they are learning as long as there moves are monitored by a suitable adult and keeping them away from potentially dangerous websites then the internet is a really good thing.
Would you like to turn your site or create a site into a learning tool for children then please visit rel=nofollow http://www.liquidbubble.com for more information.
Lucy Lewis is new at writing articles, with her charming and inquisitive mind she wants to explore the literacy world in a whole different light. So watch out for further articles.
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Is-the-Internet-Good-for-Our-Children?&id=6529342] Is the Internet Good for Our Children?
I believe without the internet for our children we would be taking away a valuable source of learning material. I know my 13 year old step daughter would think it was the end of the world without the internet. Her whole life is online as she would say, I will never be able to understand how she can spend all day with her friends and then come home from school and automatically go onto the computer and chat to the same friends she has been with all day long. She spends 60% of her time on social networking sites such as 'Facebook' but the rest of time she uses a variety of different website program called Picnik where she creates and edits pictures enabling her creative side, she goes onto YouTube to listen to songs, she even goes onto Google and finds quizzes and i.q tests she can do, and when she wasn't happy with the result she does them over and over to try to improve. I know if I put an i.q test in front of her that she has to write on she will say no in an instant. Kids think that the internet is one big game.
She also searches the internet for websites that will improve her equations for maths at school and goes on the GCSE Bitesize website and studies on her own accord with no word from us that in itself is a big feat for my step daughter. Websites such as the GCSE Bitesize website is a fantastic site for children of all ages and it also has learning games which both of my step daughters love to go on. She's always playing online games which test her spatial and learning skills as well as her overall general knowledge, and again just like her i.q tests she repeats them over and over again until she gets them all correct.
She also makes her own movies on windows movie maker, she makes music videos and then puts them on 'YouTube' I do not understand this program even after looking at it for several minutes, I would not have a clue what to do. She uses Google as a tool to learn and has even admitted that she will often turn to Google when she is too embarrassed or shy to ask anyone directly. This is an excellent learning tool for children who like my step daughter who has questions that want answering, but doesn't know who to ask. This is what the internet offers for children today.
Even though kids may spend the majority of time in front of the computer they are learning something new every day, whether that would be on an intellectual level or a creative level, either way they are learning as long as there moves are monitored by a suitable adult and keeping them away from potentially dangerous websites then the internet is a really good thing.
Would you like to turn your site or create a site into a learning tool for children then please visit rel=nofollow http://www.liquidbubble.com for more information.
Lucy Lewis is new at writing articles, with her charming and inquisitive mind she wants to explore the literacy world in a whole different light. So watch out for further articles.
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Is-the-Internet-Good-for-Our-Children?&id=6529342] Is the Internet Good for Our Children?
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Child Safety and Preventing Accidents in the Home
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Luke_T_Mathews]Luke T Mathews
The home your provide for your children should be one of the safest places for them to be but shocking statistics show that an average 2,096 children under the age of 14 die each year in the US from a home injury as reported by the US Home Safety Council. So how can we make our homes a safer environment for our children?
Baby-Proofing Your Child's Room
When we buy furniture and accessories for our children's rooms we often choose them on looks first, then quality with safety coming low on our list of priorities however safety should be top of our list.
� All bedding and mattresses should meet current fire standards regulations and this should be clearly marked on the label.
� Ideally corners should be rounded to prevent nasty cuts and bashes but if they are not then you can buy corner guards that simply attach to those sharp corners making them much more child-friendly.
� Check that drawers are fitted with safety mechanisms to prevent little fingers from getting trapped.
� Windows should be fitted with window guards to stop them from being opened too wide and window dressings such as cords should be kept safely out of the way of little hands. Similarly don't hang anything within reach of their cots, including mobiles.
� All electrical cords should also be kept out of reach and wall sockets blocked.
� Furniture should be secure and drawers and bookshelves fastened to the wall. Make sure that there is nothing they cannot reach without having to stand on something.
Have a crawl around their room on your hands and knees. It might look silly but only at this perspective can you get access to the areas they are most likely to explore and spot any potential hazards.
Preventing Falls
When a toddler starts to explore their environment, this is when they are most vulnerable to falls and trips as they are unsteady on their feet and just finding their balance. Hard as it might be, try to keep rooms free from clutter. Simple storage are very effective at providing specific areas for toys and other household clutter, thus keeping them off the floor.
Also ensure that stair gates are fitted to both the top and bottom of any staircases and that stairs are kept clear and the carpets are not worn or damaged.
Hard floors are not ideal for children as they can get slippy, especially when wearing socks; spillages become hazardous and of course a hard floor is not a nice thing to land on. So consider carpeting the rooms your child uses most, like the living room and bedroom and check that any rugs on hard floors have a non-slip lining.
First Aid
You cannot prevent 100% of accidents in your home but you can significantly reduce the risk by taking some simple precautions. Above all, consider signing yourself up for a First Aid Course which will give you the confidence and knowledge to be able to deal with any kind of trauma, from a bruised knee to something more serious such as choking. Because, no matter how careful you are as a parent, accidents still do happen but you can make a huge difference to the outcome with a little bit of training.
Besides sharing his view on blogging, Luke Mathews loves reading [http://www.myfree-ebooks.org/]free ebooks. He would like to recommend people to [http://www.myfree-ebooks.org]download free ebooks and educate them self's even more!
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Child-Safety-and-Preventing-Accidents-in-the-Home&id=6574209] Child Safety and Preventing Accidents in the Home
The home your provide for your children should be one of the safest places for them to be but shocking statistics show that an average 2,096 children under the age of 14 die each year in the US from a home injury as reported by the US Home Safety Council. So how can we make our homes a safer environment for our children?
Baby-Proofing Your Child's Room
When we buy furniture and accessories for our children's rooms we often choose them on looks first, then quality with safety coming low on our list of priorities however safety should be top of our list.
� All bedding and mattresses should meet current fire standards regulations and this should be clearly marked on the label.
� Ideally corners should be rounded to prevent nasty cuts and bashes but if they are not then you can buy corner guards that simply attach to those sharp corners making them much more child-friendly.
� Check that drawers are fitted with safety mechanisms to prevent little fingers from getting trapped.
� Windows should be fitted with window guards to stop them from being opened too wide and window dressings such as cords should be kept safely out of the way of little hands. Similarly don't hang anything within reach of their cots, including mobiles.
� All electrical cords should also be kept out of reach and wall sockets blocked.
� Furniture should be secure and drawers and bookshelves fastened to the wall. Make sure that there is nothing they cannot reach without having to stand on something.
Have a crawl around their room on your hands and knees. It might look silly but only at this perspective can you get access to the areas they are most likely to explore and spot any potential hazards.
Preventing Falls
When a toddler starts to explore their environment, this is when they are most vulnerable to falls and trips as they are unsteady on their feet and just finding their balance. Hard as it might be, try to keep rooms free from clutter. Simple storage are very effective at providing specific areas for toys and other household clutter, thus keeping them off the floor.
Also ensure that stair gates are fitted to both the top and bottom of any staircases and that stairs are kept clear and the carpets are not worn or damaged.
Hard floors are not ideal for children as they can get slippy, especially when wearing socks; spillages become hazardous and of course a hard floor is not a nice thing to land on. So consider carpeting the rooms your child uses most, like the living room and bedroom and check that any rugs on hard floors have a non-slip lining.
First Aid
You cannot prevent 100% of accidents in your home but you can significantly reduce the risk by taking some simple precautions. Above all, consider signing yourself up for a First Aid Course which will give you the confidence and knowledge to be able to deal with any kind of trauma, from a bruised knee to something more serious such as choking. Because, no matter how careful you are as a parent, accidents still do happen but you can make a huge difference to the outcome with a little bit of training.
Besides sharing his view on blogging, Luke Mathews loves reading [http://www.myfree-ebooks.org/]free ebooks. He would like to recommend people to [http://www.myfree-ebooks.org]download free ebooks and educate them self's even more!
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Child-Safety-and-Preventing-Accidents-in-the-Home&id=6574209] Child Safety and Preventing Accidents in the Home
Monday, December 19, 2011
Pros and Cons of Teen Part-Time Employment
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=John_R._Morella,_Ph.D.]John R. Morella, Ph.D.
You might be surprised that many teens have part-time jobs. Some may have jobs as "baby sitters," work for their family's businesses or do lawn services. Many work for employers in retail, fast-food and in other ventures. According to the August, 2011, Bureau of Labor Statistics, U.S. Dept. of Labor, 25.4% of teens, ages 16 to 19 held part-time or full-time jobs. About 10% of 15 year olds worked and predictably, this number increases with age, specific to the laws established for child labor. The minimal age for non-agricultural employment is 16. However, 14 and 15-year-olds may be employed for certain periods, outside of school hours, in jobs that do not interfere with their health and well-being. Teenagers 16 and older may work at any time of the day for unlimited hours. The percentage of working teens increase during the summer months, and more would work if the jobs were available during this current, poor job market.
In 2008, I conducted an anonymous questionnaire on teens in high school and in college freshmen classes. Among other information sought, were questions on their work experience as teens. Lets look at my findings reported by high school and first-year college students, comprising 178 high school and 155 college students. For the first year college students, six out of ten students (60%) indicated they had part-time employment during their high school years, with a slightly higher percent of males than females recalling work experiences. Lazy teens? I don't think so. The data speaks for itself.
The questions for high school students were slightly different, in that I further explored the number of hours worked per week; (1) 10 hours or less; (2) 11 to 15 hours; (3) 16 to 20 hours and (4) 21 hours or more.
First lets look at the percentage of high school students who worked part-time jobs. Males: 50%; Females: 25%; Total Sample: 38%
Now let's look at how many hours the high school students work. Males: 1. 52%; 2. 23%; 3. 11% 4. 14%
Females: 1. 78%; 2. 18%; 3. 4%; 4. 0%
Clearly, one can surmise that males worked part-time jobs at a higher percentage than females, and also worked longer hours. There appeared to be no clear pattern as teens progressed from freshman to senior status in the number of hours worked, except for slight acceleration in hours for females. Contemporary teens are not lazy.
Disadvantages for part-time teen workers:
Numerous studies have been done to explore the negative impact of part-time work on teens. Some findings reported increased behavioral problems, insufficient sleep, not enough leisure, propensity toward drug use, drops in school performance, and increased psychological distress. Research consistently reported a relationship between the number of hours worked and disadvantages to the teen. The more hours a week a teen works above ten hours per week, the greater the perils for teens.
Advantages for part-time teen workers:
The advantages reported may be factors such as greater interest in school, less delinquency, increase in internal motivation, development of work values, adult supervision (often with both parents working, the part-time job affords the teen supervision), and less depression.
Conclusion:
Look around you when you when you go to the mall, the grocery store, the car wash, the movie theater, the restaurants, and other venues; and you will see teens working. We should monitor the positive and negative effects of teen employment.
Retired psychologist and academician with thirty-five years of experience working with children, teens, and their families. Currently, author of two nonfiction books written for the layperson; A Guide for Effective Psychotherapy (a consumer's guide for understanding mental health services) and Give Teens a Break! (a positive look at teens). My passion remains the same, the growth and mental welfare of our children. Please visit my website: http://www.johnmorella.com
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Pros-and-Cons-of-Teen-Part-Time-Employment&id=6544077] Pros and Cons of Teen Part-Time Employment
You might be surprised that many teens have part-time jobs. Some may have jobs as "baby sitters," work for their family's businesses or do lawn services. Many work for employers in retail, fast-food and in other ventures. According to the August, 2011, Bureau of Labor Statistics, U.S. Dept. of Labor, 25.4% of teens, ages 16 to 19 held part-time or full-time jobs. About 10% of 15 year olds worked and predictably, this number increases with age, specific to the laws established for child labor. The minimal age for non-agricultural employment is 16. However, 14 and 15-year-olds may be employed for certain periods, outside of school hours, in jobs that do not interfere with their health and well-being. Teenagers 16 and older may work at any time of the day for unlimited hours. The percentage of working teens increase during the summer months, and more would work if the jobs were available during this current, poor job market.
In 2008, I conducted an anonymous questionnaire on teens in high school and in college freshmen classes. Among other information sought, were questions on their work experience as teens. Lets look at my findings reported by high school and first-year college students, comprising 178 high school and 155 college students. For the first year college students, six out of ten students (60%) indicated they had part-time employment during their high school years, with a slightly higher percent of males than females recalling work experiences. Lazy teens? I don't think so. The data speaks for itself.
The questions for high school students were slightly different, in that I further explored the number of hours worked per week; (1) 10 hours or less; (2) 11 to 15 hours; (3) 16 to 20 hours and (4) 21 hours or more.
First lets look at the percentage of high school students who worked part-time jobs. Males: 50%; Females: 25%; Total Sample: 38%
Now let's look at how many hours the high school students work. Males: 1. 52%; 2. 23%; 3. 11% 4. 14%
Females: 1. 78%; 2. 18%; 3. 4%; 4. 0%
Clearly, one can surmise that males worked part-time jobs at a higher percentage than females, and also worked longer hours. There appeared to be no clear pattern as teens progressed from freshman to senior status in the number of hours worked, except for slight acceleration in hours for females. Contemporary teens are not lazy.
Disadvantages for part-time teen workers:
Numerous studies have been done to explore the negative impact of part-time work on teens. Some findings reported increased behavioral problems, insufficient sleep, not enough leisure, propensity toward drug use, drops in school performance, and increased psychological distress. Research consistently reported a relationship between the number of hours worked and disadvantages to the teen. The more hours a week a teen works above ten hours per week, the greater the perils for teens.
Advantages for part-time teen workers:
The advantages reported may be factors such as greater interest in school, less delinquency, increase in internal motivation, development of work values, adult supervision (often with both parents working, the part-time job affords the teen supervision), and less depression.
Conclusion:
Look around you when you when you go to the mall, the grocery store, the car wash, the movie theater, the restaurants, and other venues; and you will see teens working. We should monitor the positive and negative effects of teen employment.
Retired psychologist and academician with thirty-five years of experience working with children, teens, and their families. Currently, author of two nonfiction books written for the layperson; A Guide for Effective Psychotherapy (a consumer's guide for understanding mental health services) and Give Teens a Break! (a positive look at teens). My passion remains the same, the growth and mental welfare of our children. Please visit my website: http://www.johnmorella.com
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Pros-and-Cons-of-Teen-Part-Time-Employment&id=6544077] Pros and Cons of Teen Part-Time Employment
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Suicide: A Consistent Teenage Trend
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Rose_Ann_Ramones]Rose Ann Ramones
Teenagers are naturally impulsive, sometimes rebellious and sometimes hard to figure out. This is their way of telling their parents and everybody else that, "Hey! I am growing up, so leave me alone and let me figure this out with myself, alone." But they cannot always blame them for acting out like that. It is part of the growing-up method and whether they 'adults' like it or not, in the finish, our teenagers will always find their way of jogging out of the shell that they have provided for them. And it is up to us on how they are going to handle their shortcomings and fights within themselves. And they must admit, they, ourselves walked that path one time and so they must understand and guide them to the path of righteousness.
Parents influence us over somebody else, from conception up to the final breath that they have. So fundamentally, what your kid is right now depends on the way you molded him/her. They can also trace the roots of these behaviors by using different theories like that of Sigmund Freud's Psychosexual Theory and Erik Erikson's Psychosocial Theory.
Suicide is from a Latin word meaning "to kill oneself". Suicide is the act of deliberately killing oneself. According to WHO, risk factors for suicide include mental disorder (such as depression, character disorder, alcohol dependence, or schizophrenia), and some physical illnesses, such as neurological disorders, cancer, and HIV infection.
So, how do people mismanage their life stressors that it even leads to self-destruction?
There's different kinds of people. Some are nurtured weak, some are strong and some are right, not so soft but not hard either. and those who were nurtured differently and grew up with low self-esteem, inferiority complex and vulnerability to relationship and life issues are usually the candidates for suicide.
These kids need helping hands, badly. They need anyone to speak to, not another nagger and definitely not another that punishes. They might not be able express it but they do. and they anyone who stays and sticks around even in the event that they shove you away.
Teenagers are emotional and sensitive. A simple mistake can make them feel broke. A simple unkind word from the people they value most can make them feel inferior. and a simple gesture can make them feel ignored. That is why there are teenagers who call themselves 'emo'. These kids ought to not be ignored or be humiliated more or be judged by us. They have this so-called inner-battle within themselves that needs to be won. One time their ego has been crushed or their self-esteem has been pushed down to its limit, they would not be able to guess what would be their next move. Stronger willed teenagers will probably lift their spirits up and think more positively and stand up again. But those with weaker mind tend to succumb to depression which may lead to suicidal ideas, suicide attempts and suicide gestures.
Relatives is of our strengths and also the reason why they hold on to something so hard. But relatives is also our weakness. Teenagers with lovely relatives relationship are more likely to succeed than a teenager from a wrecked unhappy relatives. like a personal computer, how can it operate if the CPU is not processing the knowledge well, if it was broken to start with?
But they can always prevent things from happening, right? Teenagers can always use somebody to hold on to, their relatives and friends. In the event that they need to be alone, then let them be but don't leave them. Let them know that you will be there whatever happens but be positive that you will be there, all right? They must help them find themselves and give a helping hand when they fell. And keep in mind, to have somebody who listens to your troubles is to make somebody feel better, so be a nice listener if not a nice adviser.
Parents ought to try and understand what is going on. When they make mistakes and were hurt, give consequences but give it after you comforted your kid. Let him express himself first. Let him describe what happened. And let him know that you trust him, that way they will have no other choice but to tell the truth.
Let him feel better first before you give any punishment because if they happens to be down and still you punish him, there could be no self-esteem left for him and they won't learn anything from you but feeling inferior even more even to himself.
Suicide is preventable.
Stress is manageable.
Life is a gift and so they must cherish it. It was given to us. It is ours now but it is not a reason for us to take it ourselves. There's a bunch of things that is worth our presence. Don't waste it.
Rose Ann Ramones
visit: http://r03249.wordpress.com/
follow me on twitter: [http://twitter.com/#!/r03249]http://twitter.com/#!/r03249
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Suicide:-A-Consistent-Teenage-Trend&id=6580044] Suicide: A Consistent Teenage Trend
Teenagers are naturally impulsive, sometimes rebellious and sometimes hard to figure out. This is their way of telling their parents and everybody else that, "Hey! I am growing up, so leave me alone and let me figure this out with myself, alone." But they cannot always blame them for acting out like that. It is part of the growing-up method and whether they 'adults' like it or not, in the finish, our teenagers will always find their way of jogging out of the shell that they have provided for them. And it is up to us on how they are going to handle their shortcomings and fights within themselves. And they must admit, they, ourselves walked that path one time and so they must understand and guide them to the path of righteousness.
Parents influence us over somebody else, from conception up to the final breath that they have. So fundamentally, what your kid is right now depends on the way you molded him/her. They can also trace the roots of these behaviors by using different theories like that of Sigmund Freud's Psychosexual Theory and Erik Erikson's Psychosocial Theory.
Suicide is from a Latin word meaning "to kill oneself". Suicide is the act of deliberately killing oneself. According to WHO, risk factors for suicide include mental disorder (such as depression, character disorder, alcohol dependence, or schizophrenia), and some physical illnesses, such as neurological disorders, cancer, and HIV infection.
So, how do people mismanage their life stressors that it even leads to self-destruction?
There's different kinds of people. Some are nurtured weak, some are strong and some are right, not so soft but not hard either. and those who were nurtured differently and grew up with low self-esteem, inferiority complex and vulnerability to relationship and life issues are usually the candidates for suicide.
These kids need helping hands, badly. They need anyone to speak to, not another nagger and definitely not another that punishes. They might not be able express it but they do. and they anyone who stays and sticks around even in the event that they shove you away.
Teenagers are emotional and sensitive. A simple mistake can make them feel broke. A simple unkind word from the people they value most can make them feel inferior. and a simple gesture can make them feel ignored. That is why there are teenagers who call themselves 'emo'. These kids ought to not be ignored or be humiliated more or be judged by us. They have this so-called inner-battle within themselves that needs to be won. One time their ego has been crushed or their self-esteem has been pushed down to its limit, they would not be able to guess what would be their next move. Stronger willed teenagers will probably lift their spirits up and think more positively and stand up again. But those with weaker mind tend to succumb to depression which may lead to suicidal ideas, suicide attempts and suicide gestures.
Relatives is of our strengths and also the reason why they hold on to something so hard. But relatives is also our weakness. Teenagers with lovely relatives relationship are more likely to succeed than a teenager from a wrecked unhappy relatives. like a personal computer, how can it operate if the CPU is not processing the knowledge well, if it was broken to start with?
But they can always prevent things from happening, right? Teenagers can always use somebody to hold on to, their relatives and friends. In the event that they need to be alone, then let them be but don't leave them. Let them know that you will be there whatever happens but be positive that you will be there, all right? They must help them find themselves and give a helping hand when they fell. And keep in mind, to have somebody who listens to your troubles is to make somebody feel better, so be a nice listener if not a nice adviser.
Parents ought to try and understand what is going on. When they make mistakes and were hurt, give consequences but give it after you comforted your kid. Let him express himself first. Let him describe what happened. And let him know that you trust him, that way they will have no other choice but to tell the truth.
Let him feel better first before you give any punishment because if they happens to be down and still you punish him, there could be no self-esteem left for him and they won't learn anything from you but feeling inferior even more even to himself.
Suicide is preventable.
Stress is manageable.
Life is a gift and so they must cherish it. It was given to us. It is ours now but it is not a reason for us to take it ourselves. There's a bunch of things that is worth our presence. Don't waste it.
Rose Ann Ramones
visit: http://r03249.wordpress.com/
follow me on twitter: [http://twitter.com/#!/r03249]http://twitter.com/#!/r03249
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Suicide:-A-Consistent-Teenage-Trend&id=6580044] Suicide: A Consistent Teenage Trend
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Organized at Last, Part 2: But What About the Kids?
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Barbara_Swanson_Sherman]Barbara Swanson Sherman
How I got clutter-free and organized in only fifty short years
Part 2
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE KIDS?
Okay, I admit that one reason my house is neat is that my children have flown the nest. I miss them but it's nice to know where the scissors are.
Cleaning my room was the great battle field of my relationship with my mother--She who Must be Obeyed. I was required to wear a smiling face and a pleasant disposition at all times and being "fresh" was a cardinal sin, maybe even a mortal sin, for which I'd be sent to my room. My room was one place where I had autonomy and that may be why I kept it messy. It drove her crazy.
So it comes as no surprise that when I became a mother my kids kept messy rooms, and I mean messy--my husband says the cleaning lady crossed herself at their doorstep.
I had to decide if I was willing to engage in the battle my mother did. I was not. Her constant nagging only taught me to ignore her. So I closed the door, gave the cleaning lady a pass, and let the kids have their mess,reminding myself that I didn't have to live like that--my own room was as neat as I wanted it to be.
For the sake of peace, domestic harmony and sanity stay out of your children's rooms and do not comment on the condition of said room.
But as everything in life, there must be limits, so here are a few rules.
1. Respect Privacy
Do not ever EVER, read a diary or a letter that belongs to someone else, and if you do, don't then comment on it. Your kids should know that papers that are put away will not be invaded. I never read a diary, but if a paper was crumpled up under the bed I felt that it was fair game and I told them that.
There's an exception to this rule and that is; unless health and safety are jeopardized.
2. No Food left for more than a week
I have a friend who asked her son if the girls in his co-ed dorm visited his room.
"Well, no, they're afraid of the bees." The BEES?
It seems there were so many half empty beer bottles and soda cans that the room was full of bees. Food attracts ants, mice, cockroaches, RATS, Raccoons, Coyotes--BEARS!! INSECTS THAT STING!
Parents must be allowed to enter to remove dirty dishes and uneaten snacks. When you do this, do not look around, it will only depress you. You could, of course, have a no food in the bedroom rule. Good luck enforcing that.
3. Never help in the search for lost objects
When they are desperately seeking the homework, the backpack, the keys, simply say, "If you start to clean up your room I'm sure it will reveal itself."
My kids hated me for saying this but it reduced stress for me.
When I couldn't find my own glasses I offered a monetary reward.
4. Give fair warning before the major cleaning
With this hands off approach there needs to be a periodic cleansing, or purge. It's best to do this when they are out of the house for an extended period, and I always warned them that that which was not put away would go to the garbage or the Salvation Army. When they returned they actually enjoyed the neatness for a minute or so before they reverted to their natural state.
5. Have a little respect
This is a true story told by my uncle Dave to his big brother, my Dad, in about 1935. Dave was at the home of his friend, Charlie Medd with some other boys. One of them noticed Charlie's Teddy bear on his bed and teased him about it. "Oh man are you still sleeping with a Teddy bear?"
Charlie, to save face, said to his mother; "Haven't you thrown that old thing out yet?"
Mrs. Medd grabbed the bear, threw it in the trash, and took that out to the curb for the garbage man. The Teddy was irretrievably gone. As Dave reported, the other boys couldn't bear to look at the pain on Charlie's face. Thirty years later my father was still shocked by the cruelty of that act and he wasn't even there.
So have some respect. What may be a rag to you is precious to someone else--someone you love!
Somehow we all survived and I recently had the joy of visiting my daughter in her new home, where she proudly showed me her pantry with its neatly organized shelves.
After de-briefing myself on the battles my mother and I waged I have come to the conclusion that a tidy house is nice but nothing besides actual safety is worth a battle.
Barbara Swanson Sherman
I am an artist writing about my art and my life. I once got a Chinese fortune cookie that said; "Art is the answer." I'm an artist married to Arthur--I took it as a message from the cosmos that I was on the right track.
My website, http://barbaraswansonsherman.com highlights my art and what I have to say about it.
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Organized-at-Last,-Part-2:-But-What-About-the-Kids?&id=6598692] Organized at Last, Part 2: But What About the Kids?
How I got clutter-free and organized in only fifty short years
Part 2
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE KIDS?
Okay, I admit that one reason my house is neat is that my children have flown the nest. I miss them but it's nice to know where the scissors are.
Cleaning my room was the great battle field of my relationship with my mother--She who Must be Obeyed. I was required to wear a smiling face and a pleasant disposition at all times and being "fresh" was a cardinal sin, maybe even a mortal sin, for which I'd be sent to my room. My room was one place where I had autonomy and that may be why I kept it messy. It drove her crazy.
So it comes as no surprise that when I became a mother my kids kept messy rooms, and I mean messy--my husband says the cleaning lady crossed herself at their doorstep.
I had to decide if I was willing to engage in the battle my mother did. I was not. Her constant nagging only taught me to ignore her. So I closed the door, gave the cleaning lady a pass, and let the kids have their mess,reminding myself that I didn't have to live like that--my own room was as neat as I wanted it to be.
For the sake of peace, domestic harmony and sanity stay out of your children's rooms and do not comment on the condition of said room.
But as everything in life, there must be limits, so here are a few rules.
1. Respect Privacy
Do not ever EVER, read a diary or a letter that belongs to someone else, and if you do, don't then comment on it. Your kids should know that papers that are put away will not be invaded. I never read a diary, but if a paper was crumpled up under the bed I felt that it was fair game and I told them that.
There's an exception to this rule and that is; unless health and safety are jeopardized.
2. No Food left for more than a week
I have a friend who asked her son if the girls in his co-ed dorm visited his room.
"Well, no, they're afraid of the bees." The BEES?
It seems there were so many half empty beer bottles and soda cans that the room was full of bees. Food attracts ants, mice, cockroaches, RATS, Raccoons, Coyotes--BEARS!! INSECTS THAT STING!
Parents must be allowed to enter to remove dirty dishes and uneaten snacks. When you do this, do not look around, it will only depress you. You could, of course, have a no food in the bedroom rule. Good luck enforcing that.
3. Never help in the search for lost objects
When they are desperately seeking the homework, the backpack, the keys, simply say, "If you start to clean up your room I'm sure it will reveal itself."
My kids hated me for saying this but it reduced stress for me.
When I couldn't find my own glasses I offered a monetary reward.
4. Give fair warning before the major cleaning
With this hands off approach there needs to be a periodic cleansing, or purge. It's best to do this when they are out of the house for an extended period, and I always warned them that that which was not put away would go to the garbage or the Salvation Army. When they returned they actually enjoyed the neatness for a minute or so before they reverted to their natural state.
5. Have a little respect
This is a true story told by my uncle Dave to his big brother, my Dad, in about 1935. Dave was at the home of his friend, Charlie Medd with some other boys. One of them noticed Charlie's Teddy bear on his bed and teased him about it. "Oh man are you still sleeping with a Teddy bear?"
Charlie, to save face, said to his mother; "Haven't you thrown that old thing out yet?"
Mrs. Medd grabbed the bear, threw it in the trash, and took that out to the curb for the garbage man. The Teddy was irretrievably gone. As Dave reported, the other boys couldn't bear to look at the pain on Charlie's face. Thirty years later my father was still shocked by the cruelty of that act and he wasn't even there.
So have some respect. What may be a rag to you is precious to someone else--someone you love!
Somehow we all survived and I recently had the joy of visiting my daughter in her new home, where she proudly showed me her pantry with its neatly organized shelves.
After de-briefing myself on the battles my mother and I waged I have come to the conclusion that a tidy house is nice but nothing besides actual safety is worth a battle.
Barbara Swanson Sherman
I am an artist writing about my art and my life. I once got a Chinese fortune cookie that said; "Art is the answer." I'm an artist married to Arthur--I took it as a message from the cosmos that I was on the right track.
My website, http://barbaraswansonsherman.com highlights my art and what I have to say about it.
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Organized-at-Last,-Part-2:-But-What-About-the-Kids?&id=6598692] Organized at Last, Part 2: But What About the Kids?
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
How Do I Talk To My Teenager?
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Kelly_J_Miller]Kelly J Miller
Talking to teenagers today is a real challenge. They have so many distractions that can keep them busy that it may seem impossible to even get time with them. However, talking to your teenager is more important than ever. Because of the internet, phones, and the gaming industry, teens will get lost in this world and it may be days before they come up for air.
The reality is today teens aren't getting enough sleep because they are up chatting, playing a game, texting, sexting, or surfing the web. Many teens stay up until 2 or 3 in the morning and then try to get up for school and get through the day. Most teens don't tell their parents what they are doing especially if it has to do with sex or weekend parties, skipping school, cheating, even dropping out of school.
Teens want to run their own life and they don't want to be told what to do. Many teens do what they want when they want and if their parents don't approve they just go to their friends' house where their parents are fine with them doing whatever. Many parents are feeling like they are between a rock and a hard place because they don't have the control they feel they need to have to keep their teen safe.
One parent talked about how they did not approve of underage drinking and so they wouldn't let them go to certain parties. They later found out that one of their teens best friends parents allow the teens that go to their home to drink alcohol and they justify this by saying I would rather them drink here and know they are safe here than have them sneak around drinking.
What does this have to do with talking to your teen? It has everything to do with it. If your teen is sneaking out, drinking, using drugs, staying up late and you feel like you have lost control you probably have. This doesn't mean you shouldn't talk to them but what happens is the conversations usually end up in a heated fight and nothing was accomplished.
Sometimes parents need to just be real and tell their teen what they are worried about and just have a conversation. This isn't about discipline, it isn't about being in control, and it about the relationship. As a parent it is easy to get wrapped up in the moment and let all the emotions take over. When this happens the conversation will generally end up in a fight. Parents will need to keep their emotions in check, not get angry at what they are hearing, and be prepared for whatever comes out of their teen mouth. This is a start, and more than likely your teen may tell you things just for the shock factor to see if they can get a rise out of you. Do not take the bait!
The goal is to actually have a conversation and tell them your fears about what you are seeing them do. If they open up just a little consider this a triumph. Parents they need to be able to talk to you without being judged, yelled at, or told they are screwing up. Teens know when they are over their head but because they don't feel like they can talk to anyone about it but their friends they don't and then the advice comes from their teenage friend which may not be the best advice. If you want your teen to talk to you, you will have to be calm, patient and not use statements like, "I knew this would happen," or "that friend of yours is trouble," or "I told you to study." It is advantageous to use statements like "how did you handle that?" or "is there anything I can do to help?" or "can I offer a suggestion?" Something that let's your teen know you have heard them and you are there to support them.
Remember parents to a teenager parents are not that important but secretly they do want to know their parent supports them and they are there to help them.
For more information please contact me at http://www.repairnlife.com
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?How-Do-I-Talk-To-My-Teenager?&id=6669671] How Do I Talk To My Teenager?
Talking to teenagers today is a real challenge. They have so many distractions that can keep them busy that it may seem impossible to even get time with them. However, talking to your teenager is more important than ever. Because of the internet, phones, and the gaming industry, teens will get lost in this world and it may be days before they come up for air.
The reality is today teens aren't getting enough sleep because they are up chatting, playing a game, texting, sexting, or surfing the web. Many teens stay up until 2 or 3 in the morning and then try to get up for school and get through the day. Most teens don't tell their parents what they are doing especially if it has to do with sex or weekend parties, skipping school, cheating, even dropping out of school.
Teens want to run their own life and they don't want to be told what to do. Many teens do what they want when they want and if their parents don't approve they just go to their friends' house where their parents are fine with them doing whatever. Many parents are feeling like they are between a rock and a hard place because they don't have the control they feel they need to have to keep their teen safe.
One parent talked about how they did not approve of underage drinking and so they wouldn't let them go to certain parties. They later found out that one of their teens best friends parents allow the teens that go to their home to drink alcohol and they justify this by saying I would rather them drink here and know they are safe here than have them sneak around drinking.
What does this have to do with talking to your teen? It has everything to do with it. If your teen is sneaking out, drinking, using drugs, staying up late and you feel like you have lost control you probably have. This doesn't mean you shouldn't talk to them but what happens is the conversations usually end up in a heated fight and nothing was accomplished.
Sometimes parents need to just be real and tell their teen what they are worried about and just have a conversation. This isn't about discipline, it isn't about being in control, and it about the relationship. As a parent it is easy to get wrapped up in the moment and let all the emotions take over. When this happens the conversation will generally end up in a fight. Parents will need to keep their emotions in check, not get angry at what they are hearing, and be prepared for whatever comes out of their teen mouth. This is a start, and more than likely your teen may tell you things just for the shock factor to see if they can get a rise out of you. Do not take the bait!
The goal is to actually have a conversation and tell them your fears about what you are seeing them do. If they open up just a little consider this a triumph. Parents they need to be able to talk to you without being judged, yelled at, or told they are screwing up. Teens know when they are over their head but because they don't feel like they can talk to anyone about it but their friends they don't and then the advice comes from their teenage friend which may not be the best advice. If you want your teen to talk to you, you will have to be calm, patient and not use statements like, "I knew this would happen," or "that friend of yours is trouble," or "I told you to study." It is advantageous to use statements like "how did you handle that?" or "is there anything I can do to help?" or "can I offer a suggestion?" Something that let's your teen know you have heard them and you are there to support them.
Remember parents to a teenager parents are not that important but secretly they do want to know their parent supports them and they are there to help them.
For more information please contact me at http://www.repairnlife.com
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?How-Do-I-Talk-To-My-Teenager?&id=6669671] How Do I Talk To My Teenager?
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Review of Safety Tattoos for Children
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Jerry_Standefer]Jerry Standefer
It is amazing to me how ideas are born. Safety tattoos for children's safety were born on a Labor Day weekend when a Mom from Baltimore, Maryland named Michele Welsh was on a family fun trip to an amusement park. Overwhelmed with the crowds of people, she decided to write her cell phone number on each of her children's arms telling them if they got separated they could point to the cell phone number on their arms so a person could call and reconnect her children with Mommy and Daddy. Other people in the park would see the number on her kids arms and each time ask if that was her number on their arm. Each person loved the idea, and that is how a business called Safety Tat was born.
Today, Safety Tat has grown to be a leader in kid's identification for contact phone numbers, food allergies, autism, and even adults with Alzheimer's or Dementia. With new techniques, using easy stick on tags that can be written on with a special pen, that will stay on for at least 10 days or more. Many praises have gone out to these tattoos, which may have saved some child from fear and abduction.
It is always best to tell your children if they become separated from you to find preferably a woman with kids and tell them they are lost and show them the contact sticker on their arm. Below are a few suggestions where kid's tattoos could be used.
� School field trips-Each child would have their own tattoo sticker with either the teacher's cell phone number or responsible party.
� Summer camp or vacation bible school-Hopefully no emergencies arise but with the safety tattoo on each child's arm it will help with a better peace of mind that knowing if something did happen a quick call could save precious time.
� Family outings-whether it would be a trip to an amusement park or a trip to a crowed beach, rest assured that your child would be able to quickly show someone their contact number.
� Older people with Alzheimer's-It is a fact that people with severe memory problems will get lost and not know who to call, but with this tattoo system they can return to their loved ones.
As you can see, a simple idea developed out of a family trip can help save parents from being separated from their child or help protect a child who has other issues that people can be aware of.
Jerry is author and owner of many helpful information websites under the JBSNET Marketing label. For more information about this amazing product visit my website, [http://safetytattoosforkids.com]Safety Tattoos For Kids
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Review-of-Safety-Tattoos-for-Children&id=6688627] Review of Safety Tattoos for Children
It is amazing to me how ideas are born. Safety tattoos for children's safety were born on a Labor Day weekend when a Mom from Baltimore, Maryland named Michele Welsh was on a family fun trip to an amusement park. Overwhelmed with the crowds of people, she decided to write her cell phone number on each of her children's arms telling them if they got separated they could point to the cell phone number on their arms so a person could call and reconnect her children with Mommy and Daddy. Other people in the park would see the number on her kids arms and each time ask if that was her number on their arm. Each person loved the idea, and that is how a business called Safety Tat was born.
Today, Safety Tat has grown to be a leader in kid's identification for contact phone numbers, food allergies, autism, and even adults with Alzheimer's or Dementia. With new techniques, using easy stick on tags that can be written on with a special pen, that will stay on for at least 10 days or more. Many praises have gone out to these tattoos, which may have saved some child from fear and abduction.
It is always best to tell your children if they become separated from you to find preferably a woman with kids and tell them they are lost and show them the contact sticker on their arm. Below are a few suggestions where kid's tattoos could be used.
� School field trips-Each child would have their own tattoo sticker with either the teacher's cell phone number or responsible party.
� Summer camp or vacation bible school-Hopefully no emergencies arise but with the safety tattoo on each child's arm it will help with a better peace of mind that knowing if something did happen a quick call could save precious time.
� Family outings-whether it would be a trip to an amusement park or a trip to a crowed beach, rest assured that your child would be able to quickly show someone their contact number.
� Older people with Alzheimer's-It is a fact that people with severe memory problems will get lost and not know who to call, but with this tattoo system they can return to their loved ones.
As you can see, a simple idea developed out of a family trip can help save parents from being separated from their child or help protect a child who has other issues that people can be aware of.
Jerry is author and owner of many helpful information websites under the JBSNET Marketing label. For more information about this amazing product visit my website, [http://safetytattoosforkids.com]Safety Tattoos For Kids
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Review-of-Safety-Tattoos-for-Children&id=6688627] Review of Safety Tattoos for Children
Friday, December 9, 2011
Teens Need Wellness Care Too
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Donna_L_Hamilton_M.D.]Donna L Hamilton M.D.
Adolescence describes the transition from childhood to adulthood. Because this has been viewed as the healthiest period of life, many people mistakenly assume adolescents have few health care needs. Not true! Though many teens remain healthy others develop significant health challenges like diabetes, eating disorders, depression, and hypertension. Many also develop dangerous behaviors. Teenagers need monitoring for healthy growth and development just like infants and toddlers.
Important growth and development occurs during adolescence. In addition to the physical changes of puberty teens also experience mental, emotional, and social changes. Adolescent well child care (WCC) helps monitor youth for problems during this time of major change. It also assists in establishing habits that will facilitate a healthy lifestyle in their adult years.
Ideally, a primary care doctor trained in adolescent health provides your child's WCC. All pediatricians are trained to take care of adolescents. Many family practitioners and internal medicine doctors also take care of teens. Don't assume, however, that all doctors who take care of teens have the special skills necessary to do it well. Parents of teens know communicating with teens can be challenging. It's the same for doctors. Look for one who's comfortable and skilled in talking with teens.
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends yearly WCC from age 11 through 21 years. As with WCC for infants and toddlers, these visits monitor for healthy growth and development, screen for early signs of certain diseases, and educate about healthy habits. They also screen for dangerous behaviors that are prevalent during adolescence.
Adolescence spans a large time frame but can be divided into three phases: early adolescence (11-14 years old), middle adolescence (15-17 years old), and late adolescence (18-21 years old). Certain changes are associated with each phase. As with all stages of development, however, each child has its own unique pace and sometimes their own order of attaining milestones.
Children generally enter puberty during early adolescence. During this time they also develop the ability for abstract thinking. This enables them to understand and question certain concepts about the world, rules, and people they previously could not comprehend. They aren't just trying to be difficult when they challenge you! They're building new skills.
Middle adolescence is often a time of individuation. Teens try to understand who they are and often begin to test parental boundaries. Again, some of that annoying behavior is perfectly natural, even healthy. Late adolescence often marks the development of adult attributes such as having a sense of purpose and creating emotionally intimate relationships. Many parents secretly report this as the time they "start to like" their teens again.
Mental and emotional development is extremely important during adolescence. Many adolescents worry whether or not they are developing "normally." Annual WCC visits give an opportunity for repeated reassurance that they are developing healthily. It also assists teens in developing a healthy and realistic body image. They also receive accurate health information that helps counter misinformation circulating among their peers.
Parents also benefit from WCC. They can receive answers and reassurance about concerns regarding their child's development or behavior. Parents also can receive tips about effective and age appropriate communication, especially about sensitive topics like sex, drugs, and peer pressure. The doctor's health information can also reinforce some of the things parents have been teaching at home.
Adolescence is a dynamic time for teens and their family. Promoting wellness through routine and professional health care can help your child successfully transition from childhood to adulthood. It can also support you during this exciting time.
Be well!
� 2010 Donna L. Hamilton, MD
Holistic Wellness Speaker Dr. Donna L. Hamilton, MD, MS supports people in becoming optimally healthy. She passionately teaches people what being healthy really means and provides practical tools and strategies to address the five key areas affecting health. Dr. Hamilton-a former board certified pediatrician-is Chief Wellness Officer and owner of Manifest Excellence, LLC. She specializes in holistic wellness promotion and speaks nationally on this topic. Dr. Hamilton teaches a comprehensive approach to health and wellness that addresses mental, emotional, social, spiritual and physical well-being. For more information, to schedule a wellness presentation for your group, or request a copy of the free personal wellness guide, "It's Easier than you Think," visit http://www.ManifestExcellence.com
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Teens-Need-Wellness-Care-Too&id=6709249] Teens Need Wellness Care Too
Adolescence describes the transition from childhood to adulthood. Because this has been viewed as the healthiest period of life, many people mistakenly assume adolescents have few health care needs. Not true! Though many teens remain healthy others develop significant health challenges like diabetes, eating disorders, depression, and hypertension. Many also develop dangerous behaviors. Teenagers need monitoring for healthy growth and development just like infants and toddlers.
Important growth and development occurs during adolescence. In addition to the physical changes of puberty teens also experience mental, emotional, and social changes. Adolescent well child care (WCC) helps monitor youth for problems during this time of major change. It also assists in establishing habits that will facilitate a healthy lifestyle in their adult years.
Ideally, a primary care doctor trained in adolescent health provides your child's WCC. All pediatricians are trained to take care of adolescents. Many family practitioners and internal medicine doctors also take care of teens. Don't assume, however, that all doctors who take care of teens have the special skills necessary to do it well. Parents of teens know communicating with teens can be challenging. It's the same for doctors. Look for one who's comfortable and skilled in talking with teens.
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends yearly WCC from age 11 through 21 years. As with WCC for infants and toddlers, these visits monitor for healthy growth and development, screen for early signs of certain diseases, and educate about healthy habits. They also screen for dangerous behaviors that are prevalent during adolescence.
Adolescence spans a large time frame but can be divided into three phases: early adolescence (11-14 years old), middle adolescence (15-17 years old), and late adolescence (18-21 years old). Certain changes are associated with each phase. As with all stages of development, however, each child has its own unique pace and sometimes their own order of attaining milestones.
Children generally enter puberty during early adolescence. During this time they also develop the ability for abstract thinking. This enables them to understand and question certain concepts about the world, rules, and people they previously could not comprehend. They aren't just trying to be difficult when they challenge you! They're building new skills.
Middle adolescence is often a time of individuation. Teens try to understand who they are and often begin to test parental boundaries. Again, some of that annoying behavior is perfectly natural, even healthy. Late adolescence often marks the development of adult attributes such as having a sense of purpose and creating emotionally intimate relationships. Many parents secretly report this as the time they "start to like" their teens again.
Mental and emotional development is extremely important during adolescence. Many adolescents worry whether or not they are developing "normally." Annual WCC visits give an opportunity for repeated reassurance that they are developing healthily. It also assists teens in developing a healthy and realistic body image. They also receive accurate health information that helps counter misinformation circulating among their peers.
Parents also benefit from WCC. They can receive answers and reassurance about concerns regarding their child's development or behavior. Parents also can receive tips about effective and age appropriate communication, especially about sensitive topics like sex, drugs, and peer pressure. The doctor's health information can also reinforce some of the things parents have been teaching at home.
Adolescence is a dynamic time for teens and their family. Promoting wellness through routine and professional health care can help your child successfully transition from childhood to adulthood. It can also support you during this exciting time.
Be well!
� 2010 Donna L. Hamilton, MD
Holistic Wellness Speaker Dr. Donna L. Hamilton, MD, MS supports people in becoming optimally healthy. She passionately teaches people what being healthy really means and provides practical tools and strategies to address the five key areas affecting health. Dr. Hamilton-a former board certified pediatrician-is Chief Wellness Officer and owner of Manifest Excellence, LLC. She specializes in holistic wellness promotion and speaks nationally on this topic. Dr. Hamilton teaches a comprehensive approach to health and wellness that addresses mental, emotional, social, spiritual and physical well-being. For more information, to schedule a wellness presentation for your group, or request a copy of the free personal wellness guide, "It's Easier than you Think," visit http://www.ManifestExcellence.com
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Teens-Need-Wellness-Care-Too&id=6709249] Teens Need Wellness Care Too
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
It Took A Village
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Maudry_Miller]Maudry Miller
When I was growing up, one often heard the very familiar phrase "It takes a village to raise a child." In the small southern town where I grew up, it really did nearly take the whole town to nurture small children. There was always an elderly woman or two from the neighborhood whose self proclaimed duty it was to monitor the activity of the neighborhood children. If the children behaved inappropriately, they (elderly women) did not hesitate to correct them. They not only corrected the kids, but very often threatened to report any misbehavior to their parents.
In the neighborhood where I grew up, more often than not, both parents worked. The parents either left an older sibling in charge of the younger ones until they returned, or trusted the watchful eyes of the elderly neighbor to help keep the kids in line. In either case, there was not much margin for error. What the one missed, the other would surely catch. In that way, children had to adhere to strict standards of behavior from the time they got up until it was bedtime.
There were also the elementary and Sunday School teachers who had full authority from parents to discipline the children if they ever needed it. There was the Pastor at church as well as other older people from the neighborhood who looked out for our best interests. There was even gentle correction from our friends and other family members. Every one in the neighborhood had a hand in helping to nurture a child.Though at the time it seemed so cruel to have so many different people meddling in a child's life, I realized much later that there was much love and concern for the children. It was not until I had reached early adulthood that I began to appreciate all the time that was taken to steer me in the right direction.
Because the children of the neighborhood were favored with so many mentors, a child enjoyed a greater freedom. Many were the days that my friends and I were told what areas we could roam and enjoyed the luxury of going from one child's home to another without having to obtain additional permissions. These areas always included playgrounds and empty lots. Our toys were our imaginations.
It is my opinion that many good values were instilled in us by all those who were concerned for our well being. As a direct result of all the nurturing we got, most of us turned out to be good solid citizens, productive in our own right. Had it not been for the entire village looking out for us, some of us would surely have fallen by the wayside.
The children of today seem not to have enjoyed the attentiveness that we had, and do not seem to possess the same values. Today's child is less respectful to others. The school dropout rate is much higher than when I grew up, and the children seem to be more idle and non-productive. It just seems as though society has been less kind to today's child than when I was a youth. There is more pressure to do the things that were once unacceptable. I cannot state with a certainty that there is a lack of nurturing in the home, but I can say for sure that we have become a neighborhood of individuals whose only pursuit is self gratification.
If I could offer any advice at all to young parents, it would be to start instilling solid values in your child at the earliest possible age. Nurturing your child at home will go a long way toward spreading to the neighborhood. Your child's positive influence on another child could very well mean the difference between that other child growing up to be a productive citizen, rather than one who is in and out of the penal system. While you are at it, take a moment to look out for the wellbeing of your neighbor's child. You see, it still takes the whole village to raise a child.
To learn more about Kidsource. Biz, visit us online at [http://www.kidsource.biz/]http://www.kidsource.biz
Written By
Maudry M. Miller
Kidsource.Biz
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?It-Took-A-Village&id=6719842] It Took A Village
When I was growing up, one often heard the very familiar phrase "It takes a village to raise a child." In the small southern town where I grew up, it really did nearly take the whole town to nurture small children. There was always an elderly woman or two from the neighborhood whose self proclaimed duty it was to monitor the activity of the neighborhood children. If the children behaved inappropriately, they (elderly women) did not hesitate to correct them. They not only corrected the kids, but very often threatened to report any misbehavior to their parents.
In the neighborhood where I grew up, more often than not, both parents worked. The parents either left an older sibling in charge of the younger ones until they returned, or trusted the watchful eyes of the elderly neighbor to help keep the kids in line. In either case, there was not much margin for error. What the one missed, the other would surely catch. In that way, children had to adhere to strict standards of behavior from the time they got up until it was bedtime.
There were also the elementary and Sunday School teachers who had full authority from parents to discipline the children if they ever needed it. There was the Pastor at church as well as other older people from the neighborhood who looked out for our best interests. There was even gentle correction from our friends and other family members. Every one in the neighborhood had a hand in helping to nurture a child.Though at the time it seemed so cruel to have so many different people meddling in a child's life, I realized much later that there was much love and concern for the children. It was not until I had reached early adulthood that I began to appreciate all the time that was taken to steer me in the right direction.
Because the children of the neighborhood were favored with so many mentors, a child enjoyed a greater freedom. Many were the days that my friends and I were told what areas we could roam and enjoyed the luxury of going from one child's home to another without having to obtain additional permissions. These areas always included playgrounds and empty lots. Our toys were our imaginations.
It is my opinion that many good values were instilled in us by all those who were concerned for our well being. As a direct result of all the nurturing we got, most of us turned out to be good solid citizens, productive in our own right. Had it not been for the entire village looking out for us, some of us would surely have fallen by the wayside.
The children of today seem not to have enjoyed the attentiveness that we had, and do not seem to possess the same values. Today's child is less respectful to others. The school dropout rate is much higher than when I grew up, and the children seem to be more idle and non-productive. It just seems as though society has been less kind to today's child than when I was a youth. There is more pressure to do the things that were once unacceptable. I cannot state with a certainty that there is a lack of nurturing in the home, but I can say for sure that we have become a neighborhood of individuals whose only pursuit is self gratification.
If I could offer any advice at all to young parents, it would be to start instilling solid values in your child at the earliest possible age. Nurturing your child at home will go a long way toward spreading to the neighborhood. Your child's positive influence on another child could very well mean the difference between that other child growing up to be a productive citizen, rather than one who is in and out of the penal system. While you are at it, take a moment to look out for the wellbeing of your neighbor's child. You see, it still takes the whole village to raise a child.
To learn more about Kidsource. Biz, visit us online at [http://www.kidsource.biz/]http://www.kidsource.biz
Written By
Maudry M. Miller
Kidsource.Biz
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?It-Took-A-Village&id=6719842] It Took A Village
Monday, December 5, 2011
Adolescence - Making It Work
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Steve_Wickham]Steve Wickham
Adults and those growing into some form of adulthood, however pubescent, are known to clash - and titanic these struggles can be. The scary thing is how quickly situations reach flashpoint. But the craziness of adolescence can be resolved.
Most mature adults, who have been that way for many years, may have long forgotten the tests apportioned to the growing psyche in a scary-world context.
There is a need for empathy; adults are in the best position to provide support.
WHAT HAPPENS IN THE ADOLESCENT BRAIN?
Sharp and sudden changes occur within the adolescent brain as it prepares its person for adult life: the salience of adroit thinking, with the capability for measured thought.
Boys are particularly vulnerable, probably due to biological and cultural norms they may be exposed to - but girls are not unexposed to these challenges.
We might all relate in that we said, at times, things that were opposed to our thoughts - and, confused, we wondered why. This is typical of teenage thinking, as the biological process of development prunes away whole chunks of thought, even indiscriminately.
The adolescent has no control over this. The adolescent, just like hurt adults, can say things they don't even mean. This may well be foreign to them. And it's scary.
WHAT ADULTS HAVE - CONTROL
As adults we have a special portion of control that the adolescent just does not have.
Firstly, we have the position of control as the parent or grandparent; secondly, we have the capacity for control - our minds have matured through our own long forgotten adolescence and through adulthood, too. Thirdly, and most importantly, we have the motive for control. We want, no need, things to work positively.
We adults are in a unique position. Despite the baggage that we carry, including previous barriers to the relationship with the adolescent, we are geographically and prophetically placed to work in this young person's life.
We have a certain level of control they don't have; we're there, perhaps placed like no other; indeed, we must feel God has purposed us for this role in their life.
WHAT ALWAYS PAYS - TO EMPATHISE
If we, in full adult form, will be perplexed in our thoughts, and our non-corresponding actions, how might our 15-year-old sons and grandsons, nephews and grand-nephews, and daughters feel when the same thing occurs - without warning?
If we, in adult form, find frustration and anger bristling from within, even at the slightest thing, and in the most unpredictable circumstances, how might the young person in our life deal with that same sense of inner conflict: the adult mind battling with the child heart?
The child within never diminishes; he or she neither withers nor dies. Nor would we want them to. The whole point of genteel adulthood is cherishing the child within.
And this is where empathy is the role for us, in the lives of all those around us; not just the adolescent, but poignantly so in this case.
Adolescence carries an insidious curse for the unprepared; well-adjusted adults developed with safety and poise through adolescence, from empathetic adults as role models.
The greatest gift an adult can give an adolescent is the support and space of an unreasonable love, with unconditional understanding and empathy that carries them through the arduous years.
� 2011 S. J. Wickham.
Steve Wickham is a Registered Safety Practitioner (BSc, FSIA, RSP[Australia]) and a qualified, unordained Christian minister (GradDipBib&Min). His blogs are at: [http://epitemnein-epitomic.blogspot.com/]http://epitemnein-epitomic.blogspot.com/ and http://tribework.blogspot.com/
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Adolescence---Making-It-Work&id=6732637] Adolescence - Making It Work
Adults and those growing into some form of adulthood, however pubescent, are known to clash - and titanic these struggles can be. The scary thing is how quickly situations reach flashpoint. But the craziness of adolescence can be resolved.
Most mature adults, who have been that way for many years, may have long forgotten the tests apportioned to the growing psyche in a scary-world context.
There is a need for empathy; adults are in the best position to provide support.
WHAT HAPPENS IN THE ADOLESCENT BRAIN?
Sharp and sudden changes occur within the adolescent brain as it prepares its person for adult life: the salience of adroit thinking, with the capability for measured thought.
Boys are particularly vulnerable, probably due to biological and cultural norms they may be exposed to - but girls are not unexposed to these challenges.
We might all relate in that we said, at times, things that were opposed to our thoughts - and, confused, we wondered why. This is typical of teenage thinking, as the biological process of development prunes away whole chunks of thought, even indiscriminately.
The adolescent has no control over this. The adolescent, just like hurt adults, can say things they don't even mean. This may well be foreign to them. And it's scary.
WHAT ADULTS HAVE - CONTROL
As adults we have a special portion of control that the adolescent just does not have.
Firstly, we have the position of control as the parent or grandparent; secondly, we have the capacity for control - our minds have matured through our own long forgotten adolescence and through adulthood, too. Thirdly, and most importantly, we have the motive for control. We want, no need, things to work positively.
We adults are in a unique position. Despite the baggage that we carry, including previous barriers to the relationship with the adolescent, we are geographically and prophetically placed to work in this young person's life.
We have a certain level of control they don't have; we're there, perhaps placed like no other; indeed, we must feel God has purposed us for this role in their life.
WHAT ALWAYS PAYS - TO EMPATHISE
If we, in full adult form, will be perplexed in our thoughts, and our non-corresponding actions, how might our 15-year-old sons and grandsons, nephews and grand-nephews, and daughters feel when the same thing occurs - without warning?
If we, in adult form, find frustration and anger bristling from within, even at the slightest thing, and in the most unpredictable circumstances, how might the young person in our life deal with that same sense of inner conflict: the adult mind battling with the child heart?
The child within never diminishes; he or she neither withers nor dies. Nor would we want them to. The whole point of genteel adulthood is cherishing the child within.
And this is where empathy is the role for us, in the lives of all those around us; not just the adolescent, but poignantly so in this case.
Adolescence carries an insidious curse for the unprepared; well-adjusted adults developed with safety and poise through adolescence, from empathetic adults as role models.
The greatest gift an adult can give an adolescent is the support and space of an unreasonable love, with unconditional understanding and empathy that carries them through the arduous years.
� 2011 S. J. Wickham.
Steve Wickham is a Registered Safety Practitioner (BSc, FSIA, RSP[Australia]) and a qualified, unordained Christian minister (GradDipBib&Min). His blogs are at: [http://epitemnein-epitomic.blogspot.com/]http://epitemnein-epitomic.blogspot.com/ and http://tribework.blogspot.com/
Article Source: [http://EzineArticles.com/?Adolescence---Making-It-Work&id=6732637] Adolescence - Making It Work
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